There once was a man from Derry
Who looked like a young Brian Ferry
Until the end of his spliff
Set fire to his quiff
Still look like Ferry?,not very.
God bless the crew of the Titanic
That night they were in a terrible panic
It couldn't have been nice
When the ship hit the ice
And they had to wait four weeks for a mechanic
I like a good soak in the bath
It's like a liquid osteopath
They say it uses more power
Than having a shower
I don't care you do the math
There once was a fella called Tony
Who didn't want to thought a phoney
He went to great lengths
To tell us his strengths
So we knew he was fida bone.
God bless J Trump
While getting America out of a slump
He's giving us his lexicon
About the Muslim and the Mexican
And becoming a political Forrest Gump.
A white haired old fella named Sydney
Had a defective right Kidney
It seemed such a shame
Re removal of same
But he still had one left though did’n he.
They said that Boris has landed PM
Just as I was clearing my throat of phlegm
I was preparing to shout
“If that Hunt bloke is out
I’ll look forward to the Brexit mayhem”.
In Ireland the latest vogue
Is to laugh at the UK and their prorogue
The Tories are fecked
And have lost our respect
So mo thóin they can surely póg